Dis One Time: I Went To A Restaurant For The First Time

I’ve been partnered with a human for quite some time now, so I’ve gotten pretty use to how things work here in the real world.   Once upon a time, however, this world was new and strange.  I remember one night in particular when the Kid brought me to a restaurant for the first time. 

It was a cold winter’s night.   At the time I was in my Pagumon form, so I was small enough to hide out in David’s backpack.   Being in there didn’t help any, and I was freezing my ears off.  I was complaining because David missed the bus, and it would be a good 30 minutes before the next one.

“Let’s go wait in there!  It looks warm enough!” I begged, asking about a nearby fast-food joint.  Even though I was just peeking through the slightly opened zipper, I could tell the Kid wasn’t sure it was the best idea.  “Come on, Kid!  I am an icicle in here!  I grew up in a tropical jungle, remember?”

“Okay,” he sighed, “but you know the drill.  Pretend you’re a toy.” 

David got some chicken nuggets, fries and a soda.  He sat down in the back, took me out the backpack, and sat me on the table.   I’ve had people food before, so it wasn’t anything special.  And by now, I was also good at being around people.   When no one was looking, I’d slip a fry in my mouth.   Someone would walk by, and I would sit still as can be.  When the coast was clear again, I’d scoop a nugget up with my ear, toss it in my mouth, and enjoy.   We shared the food that way, until David drunk the last of the soda.

Let me tell you, I love soda.  Probably the best thing the humans ever came up with.   And this was the night I found out about refills.  Blew. My. Mind.  Until this point, I thought all sodas came out of bottles or cans.  When the Kid got up to explain he was getting a refill, I asked why he needed to bring the cup.  Couldn’t he just bring the bottle back?   He told me there was a machine that just poured soda into your cup.  I couldn’t believe my fluffy little ears!  Not a can.  Not a Bottle.  A machine, like a water fountain but instead of water, it gives you soda.  I had to see this.

So, there I was, tucked under David’s arm, pretending to be a stuffed animal.  He gave his cup to this nice worker, who put it under that magical machine.  Sure enough, soda poured out into the cup.  Now, I have seen some amazing stuff; flying dinosaurs, talking garbage cans.   But this…this was SODA pouring like water.  I lost my mind.

I didn’t really think about my next move.  I just acted, leaping right out of David’s arms and flying straight to the machine.  I knocked the cup out of the way and wrapped my mouth around the nozzle.   I was gulping down soda faster than I ever had before, and it was wonderful.   But then the nice worker turned into a screeching maniac.  She started screaming some nonsense about me being a big fat rat. Two seconds later I am wacked to the ground by a broom. I looked up and by the worker turned full on crazy lady, glaring at me with rage in her eyes.  She mumbled how disgustingly gross rats are and took another swing at me. 

 I wasn’t about to go down without a fight, so I took a deep breath and let lose my bubble attack! She slipped, landing smack dap on top of a pile of burgers that got knocked over during the chaos.  As the rest of my bubbles floated through the air, all I could see was the Kid’s backpack slamming down over me.   I felt him running, and then it was cold again.  We must have been back outside.  

“Hey kid, what’s going on?  Kid?  Kid?”  He didn’t answer me, and I sat in his dark bag the rest of the way home.  He did end up forgiving me.  Eventually. 

Until Next Time!


soda makes me happy

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