Dis One Time: My Kid Spent All His Money On Cardboard

I heard ya’ll wanted another slice of life story. A little of the mundane experience of living with my human. So how about I tell ya a tale about Monster Masters! A Trading Card Game for young and old heroes alike! Release powerful creatures, cast mystical enchantments, and strike back with hidden counter attacks! Only the strong survive the battle arena!

My kid used to be completely obsessed with that game. It was all he ever talked about for a while there. Truth is, I never got why. Pretty much all those card games seem the same to me. Ya spend a bunch of money, build yourself the most hardcore deck in on the block, and then like 3 months later start all over again cause the new booster pack hit the store aisle and that shiny new holofoil is a must have! Seems like a complete waste of time to me.

But you know what? It made my kid happy. Running around, meeting other card players, trading the cards like they were some kind of cash. I may not get it, but he sure did. For years it was a hobby of choice. It kept him outta my hair for the longest time so I guess it had some value to me.

The shiny cardboard hit the fan when he started working. Now that he didn’t have to ask his parents for cash, there was no reason to hold back! That new special edition, secret ultra, glow-in-the-dark card that is only one in a bazillion packs? Pfft. He’d buy 2 bazillion. New strategy that reuses all those old cards he traded away like 3 years back? Who cares. He’d just rebuy the whole set online.

The thing got out of hand. One night I got up to sneak downstairs for some of that tasty left-over pizza. David sat at the table with his laptop, feverously scrolling through card lists, buying all the cards he “absolutely needed” to build some new deck.

“Did you eat the last of the pizza?!” I demanded.

He barely looked away and just grunted a no. I got the box from the fridge and sat next to him.

“Did bent chew bust bye nu cars?” I asked with cheese in my mouth.

“Those were for my Cyber Tech Warrior deck. This is for my Robo Angel deck” He said, not even looking up.

I swallowed before asking, “where are you getting all this money from?”

“It’s not that much…..is it?” He pulled up his online bank statement and gasped.

“Dude, you know how much pizza that is? On card board? That’s nuts?!”

David looked physically sick. He had no idea how much money he had spent on the game. That night was a turning point for him. He’ll still play a game from time to time, but these days he’s extra careful not to lose track of what he’s doing. Sometimes, he won’t even play a game if he feels himself losing control.

It just goes to show, hobbies are good to have, but make sure they don’t consume you.

I want pizza now.


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